Buddy Benches – Good Intentions, Wrong Lesson? by Susan Gable

I don’t know if you’ve heard about “buddy benches” but apparently this is a new thing at elementary schools. It’s a well-intentioned idea, as many ideas are, but I fear it’s not giving kids the actual skills they need to be socially adept in the future.

The basic idea is there’s a bench on the side of the playground, and a child who feels lonely or who has no one to play with can sit on the “Buddy Bench” – and the other children will spot them, and eventually someone will invite them to play.

Warm fuzzies all around.

Like I said, good intentions. The best of intentions! But let’s talk about what this method actually teaches children – to sit passively and wait for someone else to come and solve their problem instead of solving it themselves.

There are no buddy benches in the real world, folks. If you are feeling lonely or left out, or you would like to join some group, then you have to approach someone and ask to take part.

That’s being an active problem solver, and that’s how it works in reality. Kids need these social skills.

And what about teaching compassion in the other kids? Again, that’s a good intention. But we need to teach those kids to be proactive, too, and help them learn to recognize the social cues of someone feeling left out without the glaringly obvious buddy bench. 

“See that boy over there, staring longingly at you kids playing tag? That’s a sign that he’d like to play with you, too. It would be a great thing if you go over there and invite him to join you. Or hey, just wave him over. He’ll understand the invitation.”

Good intentions are one thing. Good lessons are better. Let’s give kids the tools they really need to be successful in life.

What do you think? Am I way off-base here and buddy benches are the new best thing ever? Or is there some merit to my thought that kids sitting around, waiting to have their problems solved by someone else probably isn’t the best lesson we want them to learn? Can’t we teach kids how to include their peers another way?

Susan Gable is the Executive Director at izzit.org. She holds a BA in Psychology from Douglas College/Rutgers University and is a certified elementary teacher in 3 states with 10 years of classroom experience. She’s also a multi-published award-winning author, and has presented numerous public speaking events & workshops for writers, readers, teachers and parents. 

Things to Discuss on the First Day of School by Mike Siekkinen

The first day of school is often a busy, scary and sometimes disorganized event, especially for new students (and teachers). Having a list of items to discuss with your students can help keep you organized and in control. Having a list also ensures that students will get the required information about school rules, times and class conduct. Here is my list for the first day. This can be modified to fit your individual circumstances. Hopefully you find this useful.

• Gum/snacks/ food
• Trash (where and when)
• No clock (I don’t use one in my class)
• Entering procedures/ exiting procedures
• Lunch (time and prices)
• Weekly schedule
• Text books
• Upcoming events
• Cell phones
• Field trips
• Buses
• Agendas and hall passes
• Required supplies
• Chromebook use/misuse
• Fire drill procedures/ intruder drills
• My desk/ your supplies
• Classroom temp.
• Substitute teachers (how to act)
• Restroom breaks
• Late work/ due dates
• Class binders
• Homework
• Turning in work (where and how)

Dr. Mike Siekkinen, a retired U.S. Navy submariner, became a teacher as a second career. He teaches history at St Marys Middle School as well as Adult and Career Education at Valdosta State in Georgia.

Evaluations by Andy Jobson

It’s that time of year again.  As a department chair, I am tasked with providing an assessment of each member of the English faculty, noting a variety of issues as “excellent,” “proficient,” or “needs improvement.”  It’s a challenging task.  For one thing, I don’t get to spend very much time in their classrooms, as I stay quite busy with my own students and planning.  For another, I recognize that we are all on a spectrum of ability… where does ‘proficient’ become ‘excellent’ (defined as “it would be difficult to do any better”)?  Don’t we always think we can do something better?  I want to praise my teachers, yet I know that I also need to prod them to strive for more.  At our private academy, there is no room for mediocrity.

I also know that if I mark too many items as “needs improvement,” I can crush a younger teacher’s spirit, creating self-doubt.  So finding that balance is tricky—I want to acknowledge the good, praise the great, and point out the not-so-good while encouraging him or her to see that there is hope for improvement.

Reflecting on my teacher evaluations makes me ponder whether I’m too cavalier sometimes in my student assessments.  Teenagers are, if anything, more sensitive than my teachers.  They need praise as well as guidance.  I have found rubrics can be very helpful in this regard, as with appropriate forethought I can identify several areas likely to receive praise as well as focusing on a few new content or skill areas to assess. 

One particular challenge in assessing student work is the short attention span they have for feedback; it’s not unusual for me to write all sorts of comments throughout an essay, only to watch the boys flip to the back and look at their ‘score,’ the grade, and be done.  I may stop putting the final number on the paper and make them read the material I’ve written to find the grade buried somewhere in the notes! 

An educator of 22 years, Andy Jobson has taught government, economics, and U.S. History. Currently teaching English literature at Riverside Military Academy in Gainesville, GA, he’s also been an administrator, a STAR teacher twice, and taught elementary school with Teach for America.

Top 5 Books to Try When You Have Time…. by Mike Siekkinen

Teachers have a ton of extra time on their hands…during the summer.

I thought I would share some of my favorite books and why I love them. Many are read by my students and give us things to discuss or can be recommendations also so here goes:

1. Lord of the Rings – I love this story. Complex world with its own language. Most kids have seen the movie but it’s nothing is like the original tale. The original fantasy novel to start the genre! You can add the Hobbit also as it is the front story.

2. The True Game – This is a series of 3 novels that make for a great read. Science fiction with a fantasy “kick.” Easy read with a neat world where people are born with “powers.” I almost envision these as pieces on a board battling it out. I’ve never read anything quite like it.

3. The Stand - Hands down the best of Stephen King! What a story! A disease wipes out humanity with a handful of survivors. Good versus evil! A supernatural twist thrown in for good measure. Characters you’ll love and hate. Awesome read!

4. Harry Potter - Don’t scoff! Yes,they are children’s books but they are also an enjoyable read! Great storytelling is great storytelling! You’ve seen the story but if you haven’t read it, you should. The book is always better than the movie!

5. Call of the Wild - Great classic read. Adventure and coming-of-age story. Not sure if this is required reading anymore but it should be. I also recommend for you “northerners” a similar book Trap lines North. Bygone era but I used to read this as winter rolled in before I started my own trap line. I used to trap mink and muskrat to get Christmas money to buy gifts for family. 


Give these a try. I think you’ll find some enjoyable reading!

Dr. Mike Siekkinen, a retired U.S. Navy submariner, became a teacher as a second career. He teaches history at St Marys Middle School as well as Adult and Career Education at Valdosta State in Georgia.

From the Homeschool Front...Competitive Speaking by Colleen Hroncich

As I mentioned in a previous post, one of my goals in educating my children at home is to raise adults who can think critically. While there are many tools that I use to help accomplish this objective, competitive speech and debate probably tops the list. Whether you are a professional teacher, a homeschooler, or a concerned parent, I urge you to look into speech and debate opportunities for your children/students.

The most obvious benefit of competitive speaking is that the kids become better public speakers. (Duh, you’re probably thinking!) No one who knew my oldest daughter in elementary school ever would have predicted that in her sophomore year she’d be top speaker out of 56 debaters at a tournament drawing kids from throughout New England. My younger kids have followed her lead and are better public speakers (at ages 14, 12, and 10) than many adults.

While public speaking proficiency is important, the ability to analyze what they read, look at issues from multiple sides, draw conclusions based on in-depth research, quickly evaluate a question or argument and formulate a response, and remain friends with opponents after a heated debate are equally valuable takeaways from speech and debate. Although I must admit that it can be disconcerting when your child spots the flaws in your reasoning and calls you on it!

If you’re a homeschooler, there are several leagues you can consider: NCFCA, Stoa, and CCA are three with which I’m familiar. For teachers at public or private schools the leagues I know of are NSDA and NCFL. Homeschoolers can form teams in NCFL (we did that this year), but they have to go through their local public school to compete in NSDA. Different leagues are more popular in various regions of the country.


If you’d like more information, please let me know in the comments. If I don’t know the answer to your questions, I can probably direct you to someone who does.

Colleen Hroncich loves that homeschooling allows her to learn right alongside her children. A published author and former policy analyst, Colleen’s favorite subjects are economics/public policy and history. She has been active in several homeschool co-ops and is a speech and debate coach.

From the Homeschool Front...Life Skills by Colleen Hroncich

Life skills. Way back in the old days, parents and grandparents passed life skills on to the younger generations. Basic carpentry, plumbing, home repairs, sewing, food preservation, and more were common knowledge to most people. Not anymore. These days it is a challenge to find someone with one of these skills – much less all of them.

Several years ago it occurred to me that neither my husband nor I had any of these life skills. How would we pass them on to our kids when we didn’t possess them ourselves? Moreover, with the school calendar ruling our lives, how would we ever find the time for the kids to learn them from someone else? This problem was one of the initial motivators in our decision to begin educating our children at home.

Of course, having the kids at home didn’t solve the problem of us not having the skills to pass on to them. For that we’ve had to use outside resources. Fortunately, in the homeschool world these skills aren’t so hard to find. Friends of ours have given our kids lessons in sewing, knitting, gardening, and construction. My son was able to help the contractor who finished our basement and learned how to frame walls, hang drywall, and install electrical boxes (although we won’t let him try that one on his own!). He and I went on to build beds for him and my daughter – we even added a bookcase headboard to his.

My girls weren’t too interested in carpentry work; the culinary arts appeal to them. They’ve taken classes in cooking, canning, and gardening. My oldest daughter takes on meal planning and preparation a few days a month, and her sister wants to follow suit. (I don’t like to cook, so it works for me!)

We still have a long ways to go before I can say my kids are proficient at these life skills. But at least we’re farther down the road than we were a few years ago.

Colleen Hroncich loves that homeschooling allows her to learn right alongside her children. A published author and former policy analyst, Colleen’s favorite subjects are economics/public policy and history. She has been active in several homeschool co-ops and is a speech and debate coach.

Educational Field Trips by Mike Siekkinen

I love a good field trip! My students do also. The chance to leave school for the day and visit somewhere, anywhere, can be a really fun and educational time for students and teachers. I have been my school’s “field trip guy” for many years now. I take my classes (team) on field trips at least once a quarter. When I first started this many years ago, I was told this was difficult, dangerous and expensive. With proper planning and research, field trips are high points of the year for all of us.

First, choose a place that can relate to your curriculum. If you are a biology teacher this may be a national park, a zoo, or a museum. For history, look around your area for historical sites or perhaps even in your home town. Many of these sites can be free for educational groups or very reasonable. I use a local military base, local historical sites, state parks and also cultural celebrations in the local area. 

Most of my trips, I only have to pay for transportation. I fund my field trips (as my district has no funding for field trips) by student donations. I have also been blessed to receive the Target Field Trip Grant a number of years ($700 per year). My field trips are always linked to instruction. For instance, I visit Okefenokee State Wildlife refuge. I link this to standards we have to teach in science, history and we always include writing assignments and research before and after each field trip as well as we finds a way to work in mathematics. Most school systems have some procedure and required paperwork to do before going on a field trip. Ask your principal what the district’s policies are regarding trips. Mine is supportive though I have to find my own money. With good planning, field trips are a great way to get students and teachers out of the classroom to show students real life applications to what they learned at school!

Dr. Mike Siekkinen, a retired U.S. Navy submariner, became a teacher as a second career. He teaches history at St Marys Middle School as well as Adult and Career Education at Valdosta State in Georgia.